Crawford's Kingsmen Kommentary

Oct 19 | Posted by: Kingsmen Quartet
REAL MEN

 

I have a burden I want to share this month; A burden for our sons. It seems we have quit raising our sons to become men. We need more real men. And it’s our responsibility to form our boys into men. We need to raise REAL MEN; Men of integrity.  Men who are strong in the Lord and lead according to the Bible; men who will stand up and lead their families; men who are not afraid to speak out and fight for the truth no matter the consequence; men who WORK; real men! Put simply, we need to raise up our boys by bringing their God-given aggressive, competitive natures into submission to God, without crushing it and turning them into sissies. REAL MEN!

We don’t RAISE our children, especially boys, anymore. We TAKE them. We take them to church to learn about God instead of being the example ourselves. We TAKE them. We take them to school to learn about the world and social interaction instead of discussing and teaching these things at home. We SIT them. We sit them in front of a television to learn about how to treat a woman and what things are important in life. We LET them. We let them run around with friends who we don’t know anything about and go to places where we have no idea what’s going on. We GIVE them. We give them cell phones, iPads, and computers with no supervision or constraints. We ABANDON them. We abandon them in a world where the fight for their very soul is raging and we do nothing to fight back. Guess who is winning?

Let’s begin RAISING our sons again. Show them God at home. Live His Word in front of them. Don’t pray on Sunday and cuss on Monday. Live the principles and teachings of Christ so your son can see what a true man of God is supposed to be. . .love God above all else, love your neighbor as yourself, show compassion, stand FIRM against evil and injustice, be a servant of others and when called on, be a fair leader by your example giving thanks to God. Show them and teach them to, “5 Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; 6 in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.” (Proverbs 3:5-6) Teach them to be godly men, “But as for you, O man of God, flee these things. Pursue righteousness, godliness, faith, love, steadfastness, gentleness.” (1 Tim. 6:11) Teach them to be men of integrity, “Whoever walks in integrity walks securely, but whoever takes crooked paths will be found out.” (Proverbs 10:9) Teach them to work, “For even when we were with you, this we commanded you: that if any would not work, neither should he eat.” (2 Thess. 3:10) Teach them to love, “Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins.” (1 Peter 4:8) Teach them to forgive, “Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.” (Col. 3:13)

Here’s a great idea – let’s quit letting our sons be molded through the educational system, TV, music, iPads, computers, or their friends.  Know what’s being taught to your son in school and temper that with the Word of God. Make sure that the Word is firmly rooted into their hearts so they may know what is right and flee from the wrong. “Thy word have I hid in mine heart, that I might not sin against thee.” (Psalms 119:11) Know who your son is running around with. Know the company he keeps. If he is running with the wrong crowd, if his friends are into the wrong lifestyle, if his girlfriend is causing him to stray from the Lord – you have the DUTY to cut them out of his life. ”He that walketh with wise men shall be wise: but a companion of fools shall be destroyed.” (Proverbs 13:20)  It doesn’t matter that he may get angry and say he hates you. You’re his parent, not his friend. Many times those influences can be stronger than any other in his life. So make sure they are good influences. It is your responsibility as the parent. If that means you go through every electronic device he has every single day – do it. Read the texts, monitor Facebook, and go through their room. I hear some of you now, “WAIT! STOP! I am invading his privacy!” YEP! You sure are. Answer this question – would you rather your son be dating a girl that entices him into things they shouldn’t be involved in or would you rather your son have privacy? “Oh – but I want to show trust in my son.” Well that’s a great concept. It doesn’t fly here. You wouldn’t just hand the car keys to a 16 year old and tell them to “TAKE OFF, I TRUST YOU!” We can’t send our boys out into life that way either. Know what they are doing. As you see your son growing and maturing into a godly man, then the trust will come.

Now to me, this one is huge. Discuss at home and show your sons how a man should lead his house and how a woman is to be treated. OH, before anyone gets their back up about this (and I will address this as quickly as I can), MEN AND WOMEN ARE DIFFERENT IN ALL WAYS . . . physically, psychologically, and biblically. Now, that being said . . . Show your sons how to be the head of the household. "But I want you to understand that Christ is the head of every man, and the man is the head of a woman, and God is the head of Christ." (1 Cor. 11:3). In the Jewish and Christian culture when the Bible was written, there was a concept called "Federal Headship."  This means that the male is the one who represents his descendants. He takes responsibility for it all; the good and the bad. It has been since the beginning. Adam was not created for Eve. Eve was created for Adam. Adam was first. "For man does not originate from woman, but woman from man. For indeed man was not created for the woman's sake, but woman for the man's sake.” (1 Cor. 11:8-9) Adam also had to take responsibility for sin entering the world and the fall of all men. Even though Eve sinned first, the Bible tells us that sin entered the world through Adam. “Wherefore, as by one man sin entered into the world, and death by sin; and so death passed upon all men, for that all have sinned” (Romans 5:12) By one MAN sin entered the world – NOT one woman. That man was Adam.

This headship is not about having the upper hand, nor is it to mean that a woman has no rights or is a second-class citizen.  On the contrary, God tells the husband some very serious commands, “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself up for her; 26 that He might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the Word, 27 that He might present to Himself the church in all her glory, having no spot or wrinkle or any such thing; but that she should be holy and blameless." (Eph. 5:25-27). The headship concept is an issue of order, not of who is better or more important.  The husband is the head of the wife in the family, and he has the responsibility of guiding his family to a closer relationship with the Lord.

So dads, lead your family. Lead in word and deed. And show your son how to treat a woman by treating their mothers with love, compassion, generosity, and respect. By loving her as Christ loved the church it will be easy for our sons to see how to treat a woman.

 

To wrap this up, I offer this from the Nation Coalition of Ministries to Men (www.ncmm.org) I love this and the scripture used to state, what I believe, is one of the most important issues of our day – raising our sons to be godly men. But realize this fathers; the best way to raise your son to be a godly man is to BE ONE!

A GODLY MAN . . .

He walks humbly with his God. [Micah 6:8] He makes it his ambition to lead a quiet and Godly life [1Tim 2:2] so that his daily life may win the respect of outsiders [1 Thess 4:11-12]

He does not let the book of the Law depart from his mouth —for he meditates on it day and night so that he may be careful to do everything written in it [Josh 1:8] for the Lord his God is with him wherever he goes [Josh 1:9]

He loves his wife, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy. He loves his wife as he loves his own body, whom he feeds and cares for it just as Christ does the church. [Eph 5:25-29] In the same way he is considerate as he lives with his wife, treating her with respect as the weaker partner and as his joint heir of the gracious gift of life. [1 Peter 3:7]

Living in harmony with one another, he is sympathetic, compassionate and humble. [1 Pet 3:8]

He keeps his tongue from evil and his lips from deceitful speech. [1 Pet 3:10]

He must manage his own family well and see that his children obey him with the proper respect. [1 Tim 3:12] A godly father, he does not exasperate his children, but brings them up in the training and instruction of the Lord.  [Eph 6:5]

He strives to be above reproach, [1 Tim 3:2] worthy of respect and respectable — [1 Tim 3:8] in order that he may provide for daily necessities and not live an unproductive life.  [Titus 3:14]

He is strong and courageous – not terrified and not discouraged. He does not pursue dishonest gain and is not a lover of money [1 Tim 3:8]

He is generous on every occasion [2 Cor 9:11] for God loves a cheerful giver. [2 Cor 9:7]

He must also have a good reputation with outsiders so that he will not fall into disgrace and into the devil’s trap.  [1 Tim 3:7]

He is temperate, self-controlled, not indulging in much wine and is not given to drunkenness. He is not violent but gentle, not quarrelsome. His regular physical training is of some value, but his training for godliness has value for all things, holding a promise for both the present life and the life to come.  [1 Tim 4:8]

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